Chuchu is, for no adequately explored reason, stacking acorns into a mountain-like shape. But it keeps toppling and he has to restart. This means something. This is important. *clink, clink, *sparkle*, crash...* Akio grins, one hand behind his back, smirking as he trades blows with Utena, sword to sword... the two fencing and riposting across the front lawn, silver blades clashing and shining, neither giving any quarter, making this a slightly more intense than usual practice fight. Chuchu cheers from the sidelines, waving a little flag with an SD Utena on it and a #1. ()n.n() Utena pushes Akio back, her speed to advantage over his strength, but neither are at their peak of form any more.. having suffered a minor drop in skills with their transition from archetype figures to humans again... both wish to correct that. They both split back, a scarily synchronized backward hop away from each other, and drop swords to their sides... Utena brushes her sleeve over her forehead, and Akio smiles, offering her a hand. "Well done." Chuchu is there to offer Utena a cool towel. ()n.n() "Chu." Utena leans over and takes the towel from Chu, taking Akio's hand and shaking it firmly. They grin at each other, equals as they always have been, except now they both are COMFORTABLE with it; Akio wanders off to continue practicing around the back of the house. Utena giggles at Chu. "Arigato, Chuchu. ^_^" Chuchu poses. "Chuuu!" ()n.n() He's happy to be back in his monkeymouse form. It's really liberating, in a lot of respects. He skittles up your leg and perches on your shoulder, his favorite spot. Utena laughs softly. "You just like to sit up there so you can look down my shirt." She closes her eyes, feeling the wind brush over her, cooling her body. It's a nice day, mild, warm, spring just on the cusp. "You're a dirty ol' mouse." She pauses a moment, her expression unfocusing. Chuchu meeps. *()n.n()* "Chu, chu!" shakes his head. Utena wanders over to the porch, unlacing her shoes and socks and removing them, letting the breeze curl over her feet. She sets Chu in her lap, crossing her ankles, and sighs a little. "You know... out of everything... there's still the one thing that's left that's bothering me.." Chuchu looks up at you, cocking his head curiously. "Chu?" Utena strokes a finger between Chu's ears idly and leans her head on her elbow, into the arm of her wooden lounging bench, gazing into the trees a bit. "... Xel." She sighs and looks down. "Everything's fine for me, but he really..." Her mouth tightens a little. "I hate that he can't love anyone else but me, and that he has to be alone. It's not right." Chuchu chuuuus in sympathy, ears drooping. Shrug. "Chuchu?" What can you do? Utena looks down, reading the body language as if it were actual words.. she knows Chu pretty well by now. "Maybe I can't do anything.." She shrugs a little, sighing. "But it's not right, or fair. I gave Francois more, for less." Utena says, "It's just... I feel like I've left something really, really important unfinished." Chuchu gets all depressed since you're unhappy. ();.;() Utena tickles gently under your chin, more wistful than -truly- depressed.. thinking about how things could have been... maybe should have been? She already knows there's real feelings there... she had to admit that to herself.. and she -wasn't- lying when she told him, either. Chuchu holds up a little picture of Anshi, though. "Chu," he reminds you. Utena says, "Hey, cheer up, Chuchu.." She says softly, a small smile. "... I guess that's just how things turned out. Even if I might wish they weren't so. It's just... it's not fair." She nods. "I know, believe me. I'm happy with Anshi, too. I haven't forgotten at all." Utena looks into the trees again, watching the branches rustle. "It's... I love them both, but in kind of different ways." Chuchu gets an idea! He wavewaves his hands, like he's doing some spell or power. "CHU!" Poof, miracle!... oh. Wait. You don't have miracle powers anymore. Durn. ()-.-() Utena nods a little. "For good or bad.. this is how it is." She feels a tug in her heart, some pain. It's not for herself... well.. that's not true either. There's a tiny selfish little self in there, like a bead of antihalcon, that won't settle down, that wants to know what else there might have been... that feels it was shaped by an outside force to another will and destiny besides what she MIGHT have had were things not being manipulated.. Chuchu chus.. chu. Chuing isn't going to help you. But.. he promised he wouldn't talk just to talk. Hmm. Maybe one of her other friends? He holds up a picture of Urd. "Chu?" Utena laughs softly. "I don't know if she can help. She'd tell me to go with my heart or something.. and it's like I have two different hearts." Chuchu chus. Hmm.. Picture of Darshu, next, in all his playboyish grace. "Chu?" Utena giggles softly. "No... I know what he'd say too. He'd tell me that I should be with Anshi, he'd bring up my destiny and my role and all that." Chuchu chus. Frustrated. Tries again, a picture of Death-chan holding some brightly colored balloons at Coney Island. "Chu?" ...where does he get these? Utena asks just that. "Where did you get THAT?" She takes the picture and looks at it a little. "I don't know. I'm not sure what she'd say.. she doesn't take sides in things." She gazes at the picture a while. "Maybe. I don't know how to reach her though. ." Chuchu hmms. Looks around. "Chu?" Lots of living things here.. Utena closes her eyes a moment. She can still nudge.. not that she's going to yank Death to her or anything.. but there's a saying that Death is with everyone all the time, in every moment of life.. She opens her eyes and looks to the bench beside her. "... What do I do?" She asks softly. Death grins. "Hey, Utena. How's tricks?" Utena giggles a little. "Same old angst, in new packages. I'm in love with two people and I don't know what to do." Death says, "Well, you could marry both of them. But this culture doesn't know how to handle polygamy." Utena blinks slightly, having not even heard of the CONCEPT, or the word. She shakes her head. "It's... it's like I wish I could be in two places at once... for both of them, so neither of them has to be lonely or without love... so I don't have to feel l ike I missed anything." She rests her hands in her lap. "That's terrible, isn't it. People have to make choices all the time between what they could have had and didn't... but I can't let go of the wondering. I feel like I was molded into something, and didn't have a choice about it. I'm not angry about it... uhm, not much, anyway." Death huhs. "Sounds a lot like a paradox. But you did make a choice, Utena. Nobody forced you to marry Anshi." Utena says, "In a way, I was, though." Death asks, "So why not divorce her?" Utena says, "Because I love her." Death asks, "Then why question your marriage?" Utena says, "I just..." She looks aside. "I love someone else too." Death hrms. Utena says, "I have two kinds of love for two different people. I can't comfortably have both loves. But I can't let go of them either, because they're both precious to me and I couldn't live without them." Death says, "Utena.. this is part of what it is to be human. To have to make tough decisions like this and to sacrifice rather than have it all.." Utena shrugs her shoulders a little. Utena says, "It wasn't wholly my decision." Whoosh. Space bends into itself, folds, twists and deforms.. then snaps back into place, depositing a visitor. "Okay, what's going on here?" he asks. Death blinks. Utena blinks too. O.O "... Paradox?" Paradox sniffs the air. "I smelled a paradox. What's the deal?" Death frowns a bit. She's never actively liked this guy. Utena uhms, touching at the back of her neck. "I'm in love with two different people in two different ways... I guess I'm feeling the desire to be what I am and what I might have been at the same time." Paradox ohs. No big deal to him. Shrug. "So what's the problem?" Utena says, "I can't be both things. When it's love, you can't be split up between two people." Paradox hmms. He walks over to Utena, and cracks his knuckles.. then traces a glowing octamarine line down her, from top of her head to her toes, right down the middle. "Says who?" he adds, putting his hands together.. then WAVES them apart, knocking Utena off to the side.. and to the side. Two whole figures.. Death is VERY alarmed at that.. but doesn't react fast enough. "What the--?!" Utena falls one way. The -other- Utena falls the other, like mirror images of each other. They both *oof* heavily. Utena x.x Utena-kun x.x Paradox dusts off his hands. "There. Just like you said, split up between two people. Really, people, this sort of thing is pretty simple when you realize that yes and no are the same thing." Death immediately moves to Utena's side.. female Utena. Checking on her. "Utena? UTENA!" Utena and the other Utena both sit up, and look at each other... and ACK softly. "I'm MALE!" "I'm female!" They speak at the same time with the same voice, overlapping... O.O Female Utena looks at Death with HUGE blue eyes. ".. wha...? I.. I'm okay.." Death GLARES at Paradox. "Put her back together. Now." Paradox rolls his eyes. "They ARE together. They're also apart. Nobody understands these very straightforward duality concepts.." Shrugs. "Well, whatever. My work here's done." He vanishes in a blast of reality. Utena-kun stands up and brushes off HIS clothing. o.O Pats himself down. Yep, male. DEFINITELY male. VERY male. o.O He remembers being a girl and being madly in love with Anshi and is STILL madly, passionately in love with Anshi... smiles a little. Now he can really... The grin gets wider. Utena brushes her hand over her head, leaning on Death a little. "... I'm fine.. honestly, I'm okay.." Death hugs Utena.. comforting. "There there.." and looks at Utena-kun. "And who are you?" Utena hugs Death quietly, peering past her to the .. other her. That isn't HER. o.O Utena-kun smiles, Utena's calm smile. "I'm Utena." Death sighs. Well.. she's not going to reject this out of hand. "Paradox can be such a bastard. But.. I can't put you two together again. It's not my domain." Utena is still female. She feels female. But she doesn't love Anshi any more. It's.. just not there. There's emptiness. o.O She isn't even shocked by it, because that would require her to be upset about it... she frowns a little, because her memory chain says... wait. Wait, it doesn't conflict. And that's -okay-. She blinks, but it's because she's looking at a altered mirror image of herself; she stands up and tugs at her clothing slightly. "..." Utena-kun puts a hand on Death's shoulder quietly. "It's okay. It's not that bad, is it? I still love Anshi. And she'll be happier this way when she gets over the shock. She deserved to have a normal life... I can give her a normal life, like this." Death stands up.. "Maybe.. maybe I can find a way, though." Looking back and forth between the twins. "It could take a little wh... what?" Blinks. "But.. isn't this... hey. I'm a fairly simple girl, personification of a metaphoric force or not. This is WEIRD to me. Are you guys.. ABSOLUTELY sure?" Chuchu runs out of the house, hopping up and down and waving. "Chu! ChuchuCHU!" Points. ...the picture in the foyer has changed. Now, it's male Utena and Anshi as a couple. Paradox's doing? Or the house reasserting itself as a product of magic? Utena internally seeks... finding a deep and passionate drive for... for a smiling, teasing, joking certain ex-Mazoku.. and regarding him, her memories are extremely clear. Even up to the drinking fest... To her mind, everything happened, and she lived it all, but Anshi just.. turned out to not be really what she wanted... It's a little vague, but not too troublesome. Underneath, she wanted something else, yearned for someone else. Xelloss. She smiles. Set free to be what she could have been... Her smile brightens too. Utena-kun nods. "It'll probably scare the hell out of Anshi at first." He grins. "But I think she'll be a lot happier like this. And there's no doubt at all in me." Utena nods too, speaking a moment later. Oddly, the voice doesn't change from one form to the other.. "I think so too." in a chorus. Death stares inside the open doorway, at the portrait. "..." ..the universe has just confirmed this to not be some random fluke. "I see." She nods.. "It's.. going to be tricky, to say the least. But maybe you can pull it off. Legitimately." Both Utenas grin that same wry smile. Speaking at once. "We're used to being more than one thing at a time." Death o.o; "That's still kinda creepy. Methinks I need time to adjust too." She giggles, a little... blinks. "Oh, bloody hell. A war just started in Darata. Look, guys, I'd better go." Akio rounds the corner, planning to head back into the house... takes one look at the two figures on the porch and FAINTS. x.x Death looks at Akio. "..I didn't do that," she swears. Both Utena's laugh. They also both try to hug you good bye n.n;; Death is only one girl. "One at a time, people, one at a time.." reaches over to hug the girl, then to hug the boy. Smiles. "Hey.. if you have any problems, just ring me, okay? It's easy." They nod, grinning from ear to ear. Utena says, "Thanks... We're both still going to die sometime. At least we'll not feel like we haven't lived." Utena-kun nods emphatically. Death shakes her head, to clear it.. "This is DEFINITELY going to take some getting used to." She pauses. Tries to feel for something. "Ah.. guys? You still share the same soul, you know. Which means.." Utena-kun erfs softly, his smile sinking some. Utena swallows. "If one of us dies, the other...?" Death grumbles. "Paradox.. he's not that slick of a guy. He can't copy a soul, that's my domain." She nods. "I'm afraid so." Utena looks at Utena-kun. Utena-kun looks at Utena. Death says, "He was right. You're seperated. But together." They both pronounce together at each other, "Don't get killed." And then they both laugh at how crazy and amazing this is. Death says, "There could be other things you share.." Utena-kun blinks. o.O "I know you have to go, or I'd ask. I guess we'll find out..?" Utena-kun murmurs a little wryly in addition, looking up, "The next few days are going to be -interesting-.." Death shrugs. "I have no idea. Not yet. You'll have to figure it out." Looks at you, seriously. "This isn't going to be easy. I hope you know that you didn't just stumble onto some miracle." Death says, "The wingless are.. more human than you can possibly imagine. And they can make mistakes." Utena nods to Death sincerely. "I know. This is... it's crazy." She wraps her arms around her chest. "But it's wonderful." Smiling, glowing. "It's risky, and scary, but... but I'm free. And he's free. We can make both our loved ones happy now." Utena-kun chuckles. "And that makes US happy." Death nods.. smiles. "Okay. Well, I can't argue with happiness. Just be careful, okay?" And.. gone. Like she wasn't really there. Even though she's always there... Utena-kun looks at Chuchu, who's probably on the ground with Akio. o.O Chuchu ()x.x() Utena runs over and hugs her other self. "No hard feelings, right? It's better like this." Utena-kun laughs. "No. Go on, shoo. Be happy. Just be careful." he waves her off and bends down to collect Chuchu into his warm hands. "I'll look after things here." There is.. a compulsion, when you touch each other. A desire not to come into contact with the other. Like magnets of the same polarization at close range. Weak, but there.. Utena-kun erfs. "That was weird." He fidgets slightly. "You'd better go." Addressing his other self.. She draws back, looking at her fingers, and nods. "... I'll go now." Unsettled a little by the feeling. She moves off the porch and starts to leave, walking toward the road. But where will she go? This.. this WAS her home.. Chuchu twitches a little. ()x.x() Utena-kun> Utena-kun prods Chuchu gently. "Hey... hey.. .wake up." Utena-kun> Chuchu...chuuu.. ()o.-() ()O.O() ()x.x() Utena-kun> Utena-kun erps softly and runs into the house, carrying Chuchu in his hands. Utena-kun> Chuchu ()x.x().. Utena-kun> Utena-kun holds Chu in one hand and fans the little monkey mouse with the other.. 'It's okay..." He sighs a bit. . o O ( I hope Himemiya doesn't react like this too. ) x.x" Utena-kun> Utena-kun carries Chuchu into the kitchen, looking worried, to fetch a little bit of milk or something to revive the poor monkey mouse with. Utena-kun> Himemiya stands at the counter, humming a song she plays on the piano, while she works on dinner. Utena-kun> Himemiya doesn't see Utena yet, concentrating on her work. n.n Utena-kun> Utena-kun pauses... when starting to enter the kitchen. Uhm. think fast. She's going to turn around ANY SECOND now and see me like this and I.. oh crap. Utena-kun> Himemiya senses your approach.. but doesn't turn. "Ne, Utena, do you want vegetable stew or beef stew tonight? Along with the ice cream." Utena-kun> Utena-kun decides he doesn't have much choice but just to.. face the music and weather the situation and hope that she doesn't KILL him... grinning weakly, "... Vegetable stew. I know you don't like to eat a lot of meat, Himemiya." Quietly thanking god that his voice hasn't changed any... still SOUNDS the same... Utena-kun> Himemiya nods. "Okay. I'll be ready in an hour." Chops up some vegetables. "Ne.. we really should have Reiko come home. It's all over, and it's safe for her to be here. Although she's been go so long, I bet she'd hardly recognize you." Utena-kun> Utena-kun grins weakly, coughing into his hand. "Ano, Himemiya.. i'm not sure -you're- going to recognize me." He moves over, behind you, and puts his hands on your shoulders. "... We should probably talk about this.." Utena-kun> Himemiya pauses. Looks up.. but not at you, yet. "Is something wrong?" Utena-kun> Utena-kun kisses your ear. "It depends..." His lips feel.. different. It's a subtle, hard to define thing, but there's a different feeling. He slips arms around your waist... thicker arms... and pulls you away from the counter slightly, into him, and THAT feels.. different too. "I hope you don't think so." Utena-kun> Himemiya feels the difference... she turns.. looks.... and screams. Tries to pull away. "AAAaaa! UTENA, Help!" And CLONGS you with a frying pan. Utena-kun> Utena-kun acks and *WHAM* takes the heavy skillet right in the head and crumples messily to the floor at your feet. x.x Moans softly... but now you have LOTS of time to look. Utena-kun> Himemiya doesn't look. Practicality demands that whoever this intruder is, she get away from him as fast as possible. She opens the garden doors and FLEES. Utena-kun> Akio blinks, as you run past him wildly... dropping a rake. "Anshi?" Utena-kun> Himemiya skids to a halt, and POINTS at the kitchen. "There's.. there's a man in the house! He tried to grab me!" Utena-kun> Akio aaahs slowly, not .. quite.. sure how to tell you this. Utena-kun> Akio approaches you and places a hand gently on your shoulder. ".. Yes, there's a man in the house now." He tries not to laugh, HE even fainted when he saw Utena split in half... instead trying to be soothing for you. "... It's not what you think." Utena-kun> Himemiya stays behind Akio. "Quick, you've got to stop him! He must be some Mazoku, or a pervert at least!" Utena-kun> Akio laughs softly... "Only as perverted as Utena is.." he murmurs under his breath. "Anshi... I think you should take another look at your 'intruder'." Utena-kun> Himemiya swallows.. "You're right. It's MY home. I won't be chased out." So she grabs the rake from your hands, and cautiously approaches the door.. Utena-kun> Akio follows, to stop Anshi from slashing Utena open if necessary. Utena-kun> Himemiya steps carefully into the kitchen, rake ready to... rake the intruder if need be, like so many dried leaves.. then she gets a good look, finally. Utena-kun> Himemiya says, "..." Utena-kun> Nothing stops you from opening the door. And the intruder is right where you left him... lying on the floor with a red mark on part of his temple, underneath shortly cropped pink hair... sprawled, long-limbed and lanky, and it's Utena's FACE... Utena-kun> Himemiya inhales. "..an impersonator?" Utena-kun> Akio sighs. "No. A fulfilled wish.' Utena-kun> Akio moves past you and brushes his hand along the red mark.. "You hit him pretty good, there. He'll be out a few more minutes. I'm going to move him to the parlor. Utena-kun> Himemiya can't stop looking at this strange person on the floor. "..I don't understand.." Utena-kun> Akio picks up Utena and moves her.. him..(?!) to the couches. Utena-kun> Ten'jou Manor - Parlor Utena-kun> Utena-kun groans softly as Akio arranges his form along the couch... smaller, but still thick-lashed blue eyes fluttering open dizzily, "w...wha happ'n..." Utena-kun> Akio smirks faintly. "Anshi hit you with a frying pan." Utena-kun> Himemiya makes no sounds. But keeps a good grip on that rake. This has to be a trick.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun tries to sit up. Baaaad idea. Slumps back into the couch, groaning, hand over eyes. ".... oww.." Akio shakes his head. "Don't move yet, you're lucky you don't have a concussion from that." Utena-kun> Himemiya finally has to ask. "Who is this?!" Waves the rake, hoping it'll expedite an answer. Utena-kun> Utena-kun tries to focus. "I'm Utena... dammit.." Tries to sit up again. Guh. Dizzy... Utena-kun> Himemiya exclaims, "Utena is a woman!" Shakes, a little. "None of this makes sense!" Utena-kun> Utena-kun frowns, and presses his hand to his forehead. ".. made a wish to be a man... 'miya...." He's too dizzy to elucidate more clearly. Utena-kun> Akio stays WELL clear of this one. Utena-kun> Clatter. The rake falls to the floor. "But. but..." She starts to cry. "Utena.. why?" Utena-kun> Utena-kun hears the crying. No amount of ANYTHING, even head injuries, could stop him from being up and off the couch and beside you, trying to comfort. Oh, he staggers a little, but... he's there. "... for you.." Shaking off the throbbing pain in one side of his skull. "I thought you would be happier this way, Himemiya. I wanted you to have a normal life." Utena-kun> Utena-kun says, "A woman should be with a man.. you deserved to have a man. So.. I became a man.." Utena-kun> Himemiya sags slightly.. the shock of it settling in. "But... but I loved you the way you were. You didn't have to change for me.." Utena-kun> Utena-kun brushes the back of his hand softly along your cheekbone. "I wanted to. I can be better for you this way. In a lot of ways." He smiles... Utena's eyes. It's Utena. It really is.. the eyes that you know, the soul, the spirit. Just in a slightly different form. "I feel better about things like this. It's okay for me. I want it to be okay for you too." Utena-kun> Himemiya looks into those eyes.. tries to focus only on them. Not on the new shape they're attached to. "..but... but.." She has no REAL reason, other than.. fear. Nervousness. Change. She's never been good with change.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun's eyes meet yours. "Look into me. You'll see it's true. Nothing's changed, except this body that can do better for you." Utena-kun> Himemiya closes her eyes.. she taps into your mind. Searching for familiarity. Just because she's out of the Rose Bride's game doesn't mean she lost the powers she already had.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun's mind feels EXACTLY the same. Everything's where you knew it to be, like pulling a comfortable sweater on, Utena's spirit is around you, warm, and holding to you... as happy, as bright, as loving and tender as it was last night... it 's all the same. Just a body.. Utena-kun> Himemiya sighs, in relief... the familiarity, the spirit. It's true, then. *You're you.* She holds you, here.. with this familiar meta-body, something she can put her arms around without feeling awkward. Utena-kun> Utena-kun hugs you back, inside, that formlessness that you can define as Utena's spirit. *Of course I'm me. I just changed my body. I didn't mean to scare you, I wanted you to be happy. I wanted it to be a present for you, something that could bring us closer together, not farther away. When we're both women... we just... it isn't quite the same. Like this... there's nothing that's to be regretted..* Utena-kun> Himemiya doesn't say anything -- but you can sense it, for a moment. Every single time she was close to a man.. it wasn't because he cared about her. It was because he wanted her and wouldn't stop-- she silences the thought, fast. Utena-kun> Utena-kun comforts you quietly. You KNOW that Utena isn't like that. The soul is the same, he/she/whatever. Utena could be a cat, or a dog, or a monkeymouse and would still feel the same about you. *I know, Himemiya. It'll take time, I know. I hope you can trust me. I swear I'll never hurt you, I'll never do anything you don't want. I'll be gentle. I have no reason to want to ever hurt you like those people hurt you.* Utena-kun> Himemiya feels ashamed to have thought it. *I know you'd never hurt me. I just... I just don't know. If I can be comfortable with this new body yet.* So far, she's been able to associate men with hurt and women with love.. now she has to deassociate. Utena-kun> Utena-kun brings the conversation back out, into the physical world and reality, the familiar voice emerging from unfamiliar lips. "Do you want me to sleep in the guest house for a while until you feel more comfortable?" he asks gently. Only thinking of you. Utena-kun> Himemiya returns to her body.. and shivers. She hadn't thought of that. About to say yes, but.. "..no.. I don't want you to feel.. I don't want to put you out, I mean." Utena-kun> Utena-kun smiles gently. "I won't." He'll put up with anything and be as patient as it takes. The end is so much greater... to REALLY be able to marry you, not just in the spirit but under the law, and in accepting eyes.. "I'll do that for a while, if you want. It won't change anything. I know you need time to get used to this." Utena-kun> Himemiya looks down.. "I'm sorry." Unable to not feel guilty about her inability to accept you at face value.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun smiles. "It's okay, Himemiya. Just remember that I love you. And I'll do whatever you need of me to make you feel more comfortable. I'm always going to be nearby, if you need me, if you change your mind, if you just want to talk or be held. It's..." He touches the back of his neck. "A little weird for me too. I feel strange like this. We're both learning something new here." Utena-kun> Himemiya looks down.. it sounds like you're leaving. But you're leaving and it's her fault, for not accepting you.. "..." Utena-kun> Utena-kun smiles, and points a little. "I'm just going to the guest house, okay? I'll be there, if you want me for anything. I mean it. Himemiya, I'll do whatever it takes. This is better for us. I know it, I BELIEVE it in my heart. However long it takes, I can wait." He smiles, and ruffles your hair a little, then starts to turn and leave. Utena-kun> Himemiya raises a hand, to stop you.. but makes no sound. She's torn. It'd be more comfortable if this.. this strange thing was gone. But she's driving you out.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun sighs slightly, leaning back against the wall of the house outside the front door. "... I thought she'd like this better. I guess I wasn't really thinking." Utena-kun> Chuchu ()-.-().. Utena-kun> Utena-kun glances down. o.o Utena-kun> Chuchu is still on your shoulder, ya know. Utena-kun> Utena-kun looks over and sighs, reaching up to take you down from his shoulder. "Chuchu, I really don't want to hurt her. I thought this would make her happy. No one can touch us like this. A man and a woman, no one could say anything against it, against us. And I KNOW I can make her happier this way.. if she'd LET me." Utena-kun> Chuchu ()-.o() peeks an eye open. "...chu." He was playing possum. Utena-kun> Utena-kun sets the little monkey mouse down on the wooden bench, putting his hands in his pockets and gazing into the oak groves. Utena-kun> Chuchu says, "Chuchu..." Wants to offer some advice, but.. this form.. um. Torn between talking and just playing the silly monkeymouse.. Utena-kun> Utena-kun smiles softly and leaves you on the porch, walking off toward the house. He pauses, hands still in pockets, and looks back at the house with a genuinely sad, longing expression. But there's love there too. Trying to do right by her. He just KNOWS this will be better, once this adjusting is over.. won't it be? Of course it will.. Utena-kun> Chuchu says, "Um.." Utena-kun> Utena-kun looks back, turns a little, the wind tousling his short, pastel hair. "... Yeah?" Utena-kun> Chuchu says, "...just give her time. She has to learn to accept you like that all over again. Just try to be.. Utena. Regardless of your body." Utena-kun> Utena-kun nods. "I know. And if she's not comfortable with me, then I have to give her time to think about it. We didn't have that problem with Shin... we'd already seen each other as we were." Utena-kun> Chuchu nods. ()-.-() "Chu." He turns, and enters the manorhouse again.. going to go cheer Anshi up.