Standard disclaimers apply. Yoshihiro Togashi-sama and Shueisha Inc. and whatever company that spawned them out! As Yoshihiro-sama had created these cute yummy… delicious… explicit… excuse me, these characters, I might as well ‘borrow’ them and have fun with them! Okay, I was planning on a parody fic but I’m afraid it’ll end up otherwise. Cross your fingers and let’s see what it turns out to be? I hope I could actually do at least ‘ONE’ parody fic. A fanfic by ~> Bulma Briefs ************************* Plastic Surgery Mukuro was thinking. Hard. Her fingers were rattling on the table. A youkai came up to her and bowed. "Your Highness, your warrior has return," it said. She didn’t heard it, too deep in her own thoughts. The youkai frowned. "Emm… Mukuro-sama!" he risked himself shouting at the Makai Lord. Mukuro startled and narrowed her eyes. "What are you shouting about?" she asked. The youkai’s knee was clattering. "Ano… gomen nasai. But I was talking to you and you seemed lost. I thought I should…" Mukuro sighed. "Enough… enough… what’s the matter?" she asked. The youkai drew out a loud relieved breath. "Your warrior has returned," it said. Mukuro stood up. "Hiei?" she asked. The youkai nodded. :… Who else? …: he snorted mentally. She looked at her watch. Nearly dinner time. "Tell him to eat in the dining hall. I’ll see him there," she announced and disappear. The youkai scratched it’s bulging head and shrugged. Mukuro-sama seemed odd nowadays. Mukuro skipped in her bedroom, opening the closet. A few Makai bats and other creatures escaped out of it. Of course, not forgetting the dusts. Oh Kami-sama… "Who’s the housekeeper here? Don’t they ever do their job? It should have it’s proper punishment now!" she complained. "But I’ll do it later…," she smiled, rummaging over her dresses. Hiei looked at the smiling green youkai. "What’s wrong?" he asked. "Erm… nothing, Hiei-sama… Mukuro-sama told you to go in the dining hall," it said and disappeared. Hiei frowned. Why is Makai getting weirder every time he returned? He went in the dining hall and placed his precious katana next to him. His hand went up to his chest, feeling the tear gem and something else… a fox shaped silver pendent hidden inside his clothes. He closed his eyes. How he had made Kurama’s heart break when he went back to Makai. Telling him that he just wanted to ‘visit’ Mukuro. Kurama was having a busy time in his step-father’s office and Hiei had left him. For him to concentrate more on his stupid company than have ‘fun’ with him every night, of course. Mukuro appeared in the dining hall wearing a traditional kimono. Hiei winced at her. :… What’s wrong with her? Did she have a short circuit somewhere in her tiny brain up there? …: he wondered. Mukuro gifted Hiei with a pleasant smile. "Komban wa Hiei," she greeted and sat across from Hiei. Now, this was getting more and more fishy. "What’s wrong with you, Mukuro?" asked Hiei. Harsh, but he’d lost his sarcastic tone. Mukuro just smiled. "Nothing’s wrong, Hiei dear…," she replied. Hiei bit his lower lip. :… ‘Hiei dear’??? What the hell did she had in that twisted mind of hers? …: wondered Hiei. A few youkais came in the room and served dinner. A red candle was lit and the lights were switched off. "Tabemasu…," Mukuro told Hiei softly. Hiei didn’t say anything but just started to eat. "Where have you been all this while?" asked Mukuro. "Went to see Kurama," answered Hiei, short. Mukuro felt a stab of jealousy. She sighed. "What so damn good about this Kurama, actually? Enough to make a powerful warrior like you fell for him?" she asked. Hiei was disturbed. How dare Mukuro question his feelings? It doesn’t concern her in anyway though. But Hiei still thought for an answer. Mukuro won’t take silent for an answer and he knew that. "He’s pretty…," he answered. He thought again. Actually, he got confused with the words pretty, cute, beautiful, handsome and so on… so he decided to use the word ‘pretty’ since they all mean the same. Good looking. Without the slightest idea that, that particular word is normally used on ‘good looking’ woman. Mukuro felt like her heart had been stabbed by a thousand swords. Sounds like Hiei was sarcastically telling her that she was ugly. She tried to keep her temper in check. She knew she was ugly and kept quiet for a while. Hiei ate happily, as Mukuro looked satisfied with his answer. But actually, she was thinking hard. Thinking how to get beautiful and pretty. Beautiful and pretty… like… :… Kurama! …: that name suddenly appeared in her mind. She smiled and thought that she would contact Shigure afterwards. He should help her do a plastic surgery. :… I will look like Kurama and Hiei would probably like me …: she thought and finished dinner. Moments later, she stood up wiping her mouth. "Your room is ready," she told Hiei and disappeared. Hiei was very puzzled with Mukuro that evening. But he decided to drop the matter and went up to his room to take a rest. Mukuro bit her lower lips, looking over old telephone numbers. She scanned and saw Shigure’s phone number. "Ja, now I can have plastic surgery!" she exclaimed and danced around the room. Shigure was ordered to kill Minamino Shuuichi to get his face. Of course Minamino Shuuichi will die and his spirit would return to Youko Kurama. That won’t hurt him that much… Haha… "I’ll send you the information about this person," she said and hung up. Mukuro of course, offered a big deal of payment to Shigure. Shigure started hunting for Kurama just as the information reached him. The next day, Hiei felt uneasy and went to Mukuro and asked if he could go back to Ningenkai. "No," answered Mukuro. Hiei frowned. Mukuro smiled. "Because Kurama had had you long enough. Now it’s my turn," she said. Hiei didn’t quite get that and just shrugged. He just hope if anything was wrong in Ningenkai, Kurama could take care of himself. Maybe count on Yuusuke to help him. Shigure blinked. He saw a half naked human youko lying on the bed. :… That body… for sure his face would be beautiful. No wonder Mukuro wants it so much …: he thought and checked his equipment. :… check …: he chuckled and opened the window. Kurama had felt and unusual youki nearby and was in a defensive position. He just fooled it with relaxing his body, but not his spirit. Just as Shigure was about to attack Kurama, he jumped off the bed. "Rose Whip!" he shouted and lashed out the thorny whip. Shigure stopped and frowned at his wounds. "Oi, Mukuro-sama didn’t told me that you have special powers!" he exclaimed. Kurama narrowed his eyes. "Mukuro?" he echoed. Shigure nodded and fell on his knees. "Please, I beg you… don’t kill me," he pleaded with wide glassy eyes. "What did Mukuro asked you to do?" Kurama asked. Shigure gulped. "She asked me to kill you and get your face," he answered. "My face? What the hell for?" asked Kurama. "She thought that if she had your face, Hiei-sama would like her," Shigure told Kurama. Kurama frowned. "Take me to her, I’ll tell Hiei," said Kurama. A tone of power was clearly heard. Shigure instantly nodded. Mukuro’s palace gate was pushed open by a red haired boy. Dragging Shigure by his hair, he stomped into the palace. Hiei felt Kurama’s youki and quickly came to the hall. Mukuro too appeared the same time with Hiei, but from a different direction. "What the hell’s happening here?" she demanded, tying her robe. Mukuro showed up with curlers still in her hair, face cream all over her face, one cucumber still stuck to her right eye. "Kurama?" asked Hiei. Kurama let go of Shigure’s hair and complained about his bad hair condition. "Oi, you should use a conditioner when you wash your hair. It’s too wiry," he informed the bashed up Shigure. Kurama ran to Hiei and practically swung his arms around the koorime. He started a fake cry, sniffing on Hiei’s neck. Hiei frowned and patted Kurama’s back oddly. "What’s the matter, Kurama?" he coaxed the crying youko. Mukuro knew instantly that her plan had failed. :… Do I have to do everything myself? …: she sighed. Mukuro went to Shigure and crouched. She grabbed his hair and forced him to look at her. "You are such a looser," she informed Shigure. "But, Mukuro-sama… Kurama is so powerful! I can’t take his life just like that!" retorted Shigure. "Mukuro wants to kill me…," cried Kurama. He looked no more than a 3 year old. Hiei darted his looks at Mukuro. "Why would she want to kill you?" asked Hiei. Kurama sniffed harder and Hiei rubbed soothing circles around Kurama’s back. Kurama smiled secretly at Hiei's doings and enjoyed it very much. It took all of his will power to not just purr and blow up the whole act. "She wants my face," whined Kurama. Mukuro looked unbelievably at Kurama and back at Shigure. "You call a whining youko, powerful?" she asked Shigure, rolling her eyes. He blinked and tried to look at Kurama from Mukuro’s grip. There he could see a redhead Kurama curled up Hiei's arms, crying. Whining. Sobbing and god knows what else he’s doing. Hiei was trying desperately to soothe it. He tried kissing the youko but it even made Kurama cried more. Shigure laughed. "Ahaha!!! I didn’t knew Youko Kurama was a whining idiot!" laughed Shigure. Kurama stopped crying for a moment. Hiei sighed in relieve. "Uwaa!!! Hiei! He said I am whining idiot," complained Kurama, practically whining in Hiei’s ears. Mukuro can’t stop herself from laughing at Kurama. "Hiei… she is laughing at me too…," whined the youko. Hiei sighed, brushing the red strands of hair off Kurama’s wet face. Hiei's cloak is all soaking wet by now. How the hell did Kurama managed to produce so much of tears? The whining and crying was starting to make Mukuro uncomfortable. Her ears hurt and her brain was practically full of crying, whining… crying… whining… "Stop it!" she shouted. Kurama sobbed once and silenced himself. Mukuro sighed in relieve, thinking that she’d stop the whole damn thing. Just as she wanted to smile, Kurama started whining again. "Hiei… she wants to rip off my face… I’m scared…," Kurama whined. Hiei didn’t know what to do, but to just rub circles around his back and kiss his tears away. But Kurama seemed to cry more. "Okay, okay… I won’t kill you. You can have Hiei and he could have you…!" shouted Mukuro. Kurama stopped instantly. He pushed away from Hiei and looked at those red ruby eyes. "I win," he whispered to Hiei. "Well, that seems to do it… now, you two! Get out of my sight! Go in your room or whatever," she told Hiei and Kurama. Kurama smiled and Hiei had to carry that Youko up to his room. She went to Shigure. "Go, get out of my territory! Go to Raizen’s place or Yomi’s don’t ever let me see you again, you looser," she snapped. Shigure nodded and went out. Mukuro sighed. "Oi! Someone clean up this bloody mess!" she ordered, snickering at the blood stain on the floor. "Damn, should have forced Shigure to clear up his mess before leaving," snorted Mukuro and left for her room as the youkais clean up the floor. "Kurama?" asked Hiei. "Em?" replied Kurama, who was busy with Hiei's hair. Twirling it around his slender fingers. "Do you really have to do that?" he asked. "Do what?" asked Kurama innocently, stopping his playful fingers. "The whining and crying," he informed Kurama. "Oh that…," Kurama thought for a while and shrugged. "Since I can’t fight and defeat her, might as well irritate her," answered the youko. "Didn’t it ever occur in your small brain that she might blast you into pieces?" asked Hiei. Kurama shrugged and smiled. "First, she might loose ‘her’ face. Second, she might hurt you. Third… she just wouldn’t do it… don’t worry," reasoned Kurama. Hiei snorted. "Give me a strong reason, kitsune," demanded Hiei. "It’s because she knew I love you too much. She won’t want to break the heart of a ‘pretty’ kitsune, would she?" Kurama told the koorime. Mukuro had told Shigure about how Hiei said Kurama was pretty and Shigure had told Kurama. That’s where he knew that Hiei had considered him as ‘pretty’. Hiei snorted. Kurama purred on Hiei's chest. "I didn’t knew you were such a cry-baby…," accused Hiei. Kurama curled his lips. "I am not! It was just an act," insisted Kurama. "Ok, the price for having me as an extra is…," Hiei was thinking of a ransom. Suddenly he was startled. He felt Kurama getting off him. He opened his eyes and looked for Kurama. He’s gone. Hiei supported himself with his elbow and looked for his youko. He was doing a strip show and went under the covers. "Care to join me?" asked the youko seductively. :… Shit… you are always so damned flirty, Kurama …: smiled Hiei and went under the covers. Owari…^_^ Hiei : What? Is that supposed to be a parody fic? That’s yaoi in there! Bulma : Sorry, I just can’t do a parody fic… what a looser… had too many yaoi to think of. Kurama : Never mind, there’s always a next time. But do you have to make me that whiny? I looked like a jerk there. Bulma : Sorry guys… Ano… it didn’t end up the way I wanted to… but… I did finish it in a record time! 1 ½ hours. Muahaha… send your critics and death threats to me! Bulma Briefs bulma_v_briefs@hotmail.com UIN#13254597 https://members.tripod.com/~Bulma_Briefs/manga_mansion.html