I haven't done a spamfic in ages. So I felt it was that time again
(Unfortunately for the FFML *EvIL LaUghTeR*)

Disclaimer: I disclaim everything about this fic, besides the usual
stuff.
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Why Am I Lost?
A Spamfic by Ace Sanchez
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The roar of the waterfall was almost deafening as spray flew everywhere
along the edge of the rocks. Birds flew overhead shouting their bird
noises as they cast their little shadows all over the ground. It was
springtime and the flowers were in full bloom, the sun shining and trees
swaying, there didn't seem to be anyone in miles around. 

Except for one person.

"Arghhhhhhhh!" Ryoga shouted. "Why am I lost?" He was sitting on a rock
lamenting his bad fortune near the lake where the waterfall ended.

"This is all Ranma's fault!"

Suddenly, he heard the leaves rustling and the unmistakable sound of
footsteps. Ryoga leapt off the rock and flipped backwards in a ready
position. He cursed himself when he realised that he had left his
umbrella and his pack sitting by the rock. it was too late to get it now,
he thought, as he spied the bushes several feet in front of him shake as
someone pushed through it.

Ryoga tensed as a man abruptly broke through, scattering leaves
everywhere. He stopped walking and brushed the foliage that had become
stuck to his grey suit. In his hand he held a briefcase. He had black
hair, worn kind of like Ranma's except his ponytail was held in place by
an orange and black bandanna, not unlike the one Ryoga wore around his
forehead.

"Dad?" Ryoga asked, not daring to breathe lest his hope be crushed.

The older man looked at him with his eyes wide open. "Ryoga! That was
you! Funny how I still recognise your screams after all these years."
He walked over to his son and nudged him in the stomach, exploding
Ryoga's held-up breath from his lungs. "And you sure screamed a lot when
you were little! I can still hear you now ..." He imitated a younger
Ryoga's voice, "This is all Sanma's fault!" He winked at him. "You
remember Sanma, don't you? He was your best friend in primary school."

Ryoga reddened. "He was not my best friend! I hated him! Especially when
he had to move leaving me all by myself!"

"Now, now, let's not ruin our reunion. What's it been? Almost one and a
half years?"

"I-I think so," Ryoga replied, his forehead wrinkled up in thought as he
counted on his fingers. Then he looked up in puzzlement. "So what are you
doing here in the middle of nowhere anyway?"

He laughed. "Same thing your doing, my boy. Getting hopelessly lost!"

"Oh," Ryoga said, unnecessarily.

Suddenly the leaves of the bushes began swaying again, and the sound of
footsteps approaching came back. Ryoga and his father stepped backwards
in identical martial arts stances. His father looked at him. "I see you
haven't forgotten what I've taught you, my boy."

Ryoga blushed, but then put his attention back on the moving bush.

The leaves parted and a woman stepped out. She had long black hair and a
pretty face. Her dress had an orange and black pattern, again not unlike
Ryoga's headband. In her left hand, she carried a shopping bag that
looked exceedingly old and worn out. She looked kind of confused as she
looked from side to side.

"Mom!" Ryoga shouted.

The woman stopped looking from side to side and looked straight ahead.
She giggled. "So there you are Ryoga! Silly me! So it was you screaming.
I heard you from over there." She pointed towards the opposite direction
she came from.

"Stupid woman," Ryoga's father said. "That's where I came from and I
didn't see you. You are one lost woman."

"Oh, it's you, Ryogan," Ryoga's mother exclaimed. "Fancy meeting you here
at the same time! And I thought I was lost! What's the odds of that ever
happening?"

Ryoga started counting on his fingers, but his father slapped him on the
back of the head. "Boy, let me do it," he said, whipping out his
calculator. After figuring out a few things he announced, "About nine
million to one by my calculations. The last time we've been all together
at the same time in the same place like this was when Ryoga was born.
Just like a real family! This calls for a celebration!"

"We're in luck," Ryoga's mother said. "I've just been out shopping, and
it just so happens I have groceries with me." She opened up her ancient
shopping bag and after laying down a big picnic sheet, began taking some
stuff out of it. The first item looked like a hunk of rock. "Bread," she
announced, dropping it on the ground where it left a few cracks on the
stones she dropped it on. "Cheese," she said, dropping a green lump of
mildew by Ryoga's feet. Ryoga recoiled from the smelly thing. "Ramen,"
she said, dropping some plastic take-out containers. Ryoga looked at them
and saw they were bone dry inside, with some dust and hard looking sticks
that looked like it was once a noodle.

As his parents sat down on the picnic sheet, Ryoga looked curiously at
them. He had never seen them both at the same time before as long as he
lived. He was amazed by how alike they looked. Both attractive with light
brown eyes, black hair and they even both had fangs, he saw as their
mouths moved.

"Dad, Mom, can you answer a question that I've had ever since I can
remember? Just why do we get lost?"

His father looked at his mother with a silent method of communication.
"It's a hereditary trait that goes back with the Hibiki's all the way
back to the first Hibiki."

"But then, why does Mom have it?"

Again, the silent look at each other. His mother nodded as his father.
"Okay Ryoganina, I guess he's old enough to know," he sighed. "Aside from
the obvious problem with our direction senses," he sniffed, "we Hibiki's
are forever cursed to be only be able to reproduce with someone who is
also a Hibiki."

Ryoga's mouth dropped open. "Y-You mean, you guys are, are, B-BROTHER AND
SISTER?!"

Ryoga's mom nodded. "And that reminds me, we can't let the Hibiki line
die out, and we have been lax in providing you with a wife yet. Our only
excuse has been that me and your father had last seen each other at your
birth. But now that we're all together we're taking no chances!"

"That's right my boy," Ryoga's father said sternly. "So if you'll just
turn your back, we'll get right to it."

Ryoga turned around blushing.



******* End of Spamfic

Ah well, at least this explains Ryoga's less than average intelligence.
Don't let me even get started on Ranma and Genma and Nadoka's deep dark
secret ... ^_~.

Send C&C, flames, laughter to

Ace Sanchez
jsa@fl.net.au
http://jsa.users.fl.net.au