A Simple Wish Version 3.1.1 Final by Shaun Garin Ah! My Goddess is owned by Kosuke Fujishima. Hercules is owned by Disney. Ranma 1/2 is owned by Rumiko Takahashi. Tenchi Muyo! Is owned by Masaki Kajishima. Sailor Moon is owned by Naoko Takeuchi. This episode is told from Urd�s point of view. Set when I�m about 26 years old. In reality, I�m only 17. Skuld�s a year younger. Rated PG-13 for action. Enjoy - Shaun Garin 1/16/99 A Simple Wish Version 3.1.1 Final by Shaun Garin Chapter 6 : Wedding You know, I�m loose. Not that I don�t have my standards but with my *ahem* free lifestyle, I have a lot of dirt on everyone in the heavens save for dad himself. He is totally pure. Oh, you must be wondering who I am. I am Urd, Goddess of the Past, and Cupid extrodanire. I took over narrating this story since it�s required. Shaun and Keiichi are too dazed to tell anything about this time so I decided to take over. Anyways, I was just sitting on my favorite chair, watching this American TV show about a pair of moronic teenagers which had an combined IQ level of 2, when the two stooges come charging in, yelling for my help. Naturally, I was reluctant to help by the way they shouted but then I was forcibly dragged outside to read the letter from Father. I blinked a few times, reading it but then, my trademark cat grin spread over my face. �Sure,� I said with a smile, �I�ll help. Come on.� I pulled the duo towards the TV and pulled them inside. Soon, we were standing in front of the large office doors of Father. I took a breath and announced, �Urd, Goddess of the Past here with mortals Shaun Garin and Keiichi Morisato.� The doors obediently creaked open with a loud groan and we stepped inside. There, Father stood, currently in three parts to my surprise. There stood his son, God the Son, dressed in a white robe and red sash with long brown hair, Himself sitting in the desk, God the Father his features partially obscured from the radiant light from his face, and a sort of secretary like man beside him. That was God the Holy Spirit. I knew right off the bat that Father wanted to cater to Shaun�s religious beliefs. The little bugger believed in three entities which were the same person. God the Father smiled and said, �Welcome my children.� Shaun blinked and bowed slightly in a humble pose. �It is good to see you sir.� He said in a humble tone. �Has our ancestors Enoch and Moses been good to you?� Jesus smiled. �Yes,� he answered, �they are great help in understanding the human spirit.� �Indeed,� added the Holy Spirit. �Enoch is very good at understanding our teachings.� Shaun repressed a laugh, �We thank you for your teachings honored father. But may I ask a question? When will you send your Son to retrieve us from Earth?� Jesus answered, �I will come but not at any time man can preset his own destiny. Only after a period of testing will we come to retrieve mankind and bring them to heaven for a thousand years.� I blinked. So that�s what the recent construction was about, I thought. No wonder the buildings were so beautiful inside. Keiichi stepped forward. �Kami-sama, I wish to know your thoughts about our marriage proposals to Skuld and Belldandy. Is it all possible to marry them?� He sat there, silent for a minute until he spoke. �I have thought about it and decided. You two have earned my permission to marry.� Suddenly his face split in a wide grin, reaching his ears. �Besides, I�m planning a huge party for you both. Shaun will marry when he is 26. That�s in two weeks, isn�t it?� Shaun nodded. �Then go and ask those women for marrage already!� �Yes sir!� the two mortals retreated into the office waiting room. I eyed my Father cautiously, �Are you planning to attend Father?� He nodded. �It�s been a while since I�ve been to a wedding. The last time I was there was about 30 AD when I attended the Nazareth Wedding. Changed the water into Grape juice I did.� I started to edge back out the door. Daddy was getting reminiscent again. As I headed out the door, the words, �I remember one time...� drove cold fear into my chest. If there was nothing more boring than father reminiscing then I wouldn�t want to encounter it. *** Ranma picked up the phone. �Moshi moshi?� //Hey Ranma! It�s Shaun.// �Hey man, how�s life?� A chuckle came over the phone. //Great! Skuld�s father gave permission to marry her. Trouble is, the wedding is in two weeks. Wanna attend?// Ranma blinked in surprise. �Talk about shotgun. He didn�t even give time for you to prepare well.� //Don�t worry about it, he said he�s personally taking care of everything. The weddings in two weeks at my home church. Urd�ll pick your family up the week before.// �Great, I�ll meet you there.� //Thanks. Bye.// CLICK Ranma hung up the phone, a wide smile on his face. Nothing could ruin this day. Famous last words... �RANMA!� Akane stormed in with a batch of her deadly cookies which, thrown at 200 paces could pierce a Eva�s AT field with ease. �Are you going to eat some or not?!� Ranma scoffed. �It�s not like I wanna die Akane.� The next second, a LEO exploded from the roof with a cry of �RANMA NO BAKA!!!� *** This scene replayed itself in many other homes with varied results. In Tenchi�s home, the chaos started after Ryoko delivered one of her patented Possessive Pirate Squeezes on Tenchi. Ayeka walked in and the fur started to fly. Mamoru was more controlled, only slipping control when Usagi started to carry on endlessly about the joys of their future marriage. He escaped with most of his hearing intact. *** Skuld sat in her room, looking at her ring finger, the huge diamond perched atop it. Last night, Shaun had proposed to her and she had accepted in a happy daze. But it was sudden. Too sudden. She briefly wondered what the results would be from this. *** Deep in the Underworld, a gray hand slapped down on the ledge and pulled its owner up. A sharp featured person with a shock of gas blue fire hair pulled his bulk out of a swirling pool of dead souls. Hades, Lord of the Dead gasped for air as he pulled himself out of the River of Souls. He collapsed on the stone platform and gasped out, �Mental note : Don�t get Zeus�s kids mad.� He sat up and bellowed, �PAIN!!! PANIC!!!� No response. Hades narrowed his eyes. �Was I gone THAT long?� he mulled to himself. Standing up, he ran a hand through his flaming hair and looked around. �Place seems a bit run down. Must not have had any workers down here for a few hundred years.� He brushed a bug off his toga and grinned a sharp toothed grin. �Well that�ll work nicely once I get things up and running.� Hades moved, his black mist toga swirling around his feet. Soon, he entered his old throne room, and blinked in shock. �WHAT IN THE NAME OF SAM HILL HAS GONE ON DOWN HERE?!?!?!??!� Multiple Demons, all off duty played in the casino. The crap tables were manned by Oni�s, the bouncers were lesser Demons, and the decor was more Las Vegas than Hell or Makai. At the sound of Hades bellow, everyone screeched to a stop and stared at him. Hades was furious. You could tell by either the blood shot eyes, the grinding teeth, or even the red flames replacing the normally blue flame atop his skull and spreading across his shoulders. �WHAT THE HECK HAS HAPPENED TO MY UNDERWORLD?!� One Demon spoke up. �Hey, ain�t you the God of the Underworld...um...Hadens?� �That�s HADES!!!� He bellowed, launching a fireball at the Demon who dodged. �WHAT�S HAPPENED TO MY HOME?!?!?� Another Demon spoke up. �Well Maller found this place uninhabited so we built a casino here. Like it?� Hades stopped his rant to check his surroundings. �Yeah I like the decor. Real nice. What year is it?� Another Demon snickered, �How long have YOU been away? It�s 1999 AD.� Hades� jaw dropped in shock. �WHAT?� Then his raging temper returned. �Where�s Hercules?!� �He stayed with Megara here on earth. He then accended when they both died.� A sultry voice came from the door. Maller stood there, dressed in a silk lame. �So,� she said, stepping down the stairs, drawing eyes, �you�re the famous Hades who tried to take over Olympus huh? Nice try.� �And who might you be?� he asked. �The name is Maller. I�m a enemy of Kami-sama�s daughters, the Norn Goddesses.� �Well looks like old Zeusey has finally moved up in the world. And is there an Olympus here on earth?� Maller shook her head. �In 1000 AD, Kami-sama or Zeus moved his kingdom into the stars. But you probably could try and go back up there. I�m sure he forgot about the little falling out,� she said with a sarcastic smile. Hades burned with anger. �I just might do that. I�ll be seeing you later.� he turned and stalked out, only pausing to say, �oh, and make up a room for me here. This WAS my home.� With that, he summoned his Chariot and Black Horses. They arrived and he mounted the black Chariot and he sped off, the horses acting very wild. Hey, you stay in the River of Souls for two millennia, let your horses rung wild for a few thousand years and see how well YOU can handle them. *** Thor lounged in his room, minding his own business when suddenly... CRUNCH!!! The tall man picked himself out of the wreckage to find a presumed dead Underworld God picking himself out of the wreckage, a pair of black horses neighing in the background. �Let them run wild for a few centuries and look what happens,� he muttered. Then the God noticed the other. �Hey, I don�t think we�ve been introduced. I�m Hades, Lord of the Dead, hey how are ya doing?� he said rapidly, sticking his hand out. Thor grasped it. �Thor. God of Lightning.� �Hey I didn�t see you here last time I was up here. What? Zeus decided to create more Gods to help out? I must say, nice decor! Real Roman like!� Thor shrugged. �I don�t mind it. It used to be owned by Mars.� �Riiiight. So where�s Aphrodite or Ares? Haven�t seen those suckers around for a while. They still alive and kicking?� Thor nodded. �They should be at the bar. Come on, I�ll show you around.� *** �Saaaaay nice place here! This Olympus? Pretty flashy.� Heaven looked like Las Vegas today. To Thor it was old hat but to a old God like Hades, it was astounding. �Nice place, does it look like this often?� Thor shook his head. �Naw, only on certain days.� �Why? Does Zeus change the appearance every few days?� Hades ran a hand through his flaming hair. �Pretty nice place though.� Thor nodded and pushed the door open. The bar was a older joint, with several patrons inside. Including Urd, Goddess of the Past. *** I looked up from my Sake and stared at the newcomers. One was Thor and another was a new face I haven�t seen. His whole appearance sent a shiver up my spine. His face was angular with sharp teeth, a pointed nose, and gas blue hair, flickering with his movement. He wore a gray toga and black shirt with a skull badge holding the shoulder clasp together. Thor went over to a group of Gods and Goddesses sitting down at the table. One was Alexander, the Guardian of Fantasy, another was the Love Goddess Aphrodite, though she didn�t practice her trade anymore, Ares who seemed a bit tence when the duo went over there and the last one was Shiva, her pale blue skin and ice blue dress shimmering in the low lights. I picked up my drink and sauntered over to the table. �Hey,� I said, �who�re you?� The God in question turned around, a wide grin on his face. �Hey, name�s Hades, Lord of the Dead, hey how�re ya?� I grasped his hand slightly, flinching at the heat coming from his hand. Ares was practically steaming. �Unhand the Princess Hades!!� He shouted, drawing a hidden sword and pointed it at Hades. �It�s been two millennia since you tried to take over Olympus and some of us haven�t forgotten what you did.� he pointed the sword point at Hades� neck. Hades flinched and cautiously pushed the sword point away from his neck, chuckling nervously. �Why, Ares, I thought you said you never held a grudge,� he said smoothly. �I would think that you�d forget after a few hundred years.� He then turned to me, a slight leer on his face. �And who�s this sexy woman?� �I�m Urd, Goddess of the Past.� I said, crossing my arms across my breasts, and hopefully looking defiant. Hades chuckled. �So, you�re Zeusy�s new kid huh? He�s got taste.� he circled me, in a hawk like fashion, checking my *ahem* attributes. �You�re very pretty. Tell me, are there more siblings?� I nodded cautiously, �There�s my sister Belldandy, Goddess of the Present and Skuld, Goddess of the Future.� �Interesting.� Hades straightened and drank a nauseous looking drink consisting of a green liquid and a worm inside. I turned slightly green as well as the others. �Say...� he started, �Is Herc here? I�d like to see how tough he�s become.� �Don�t even think about it Hades,� Ares warned, �We now have something now called the Doublet System. That means that if you kill one of us, you destroy their corresponding Demon. You really want Kami-sama�s wrath coming down atop your head?� he said with a smirk. �Humph, unlike you God�s lounging around up here, I have some work to do down in the Underworld. I have a Underworld to rebuild, and Demons to kick out of my home. Do you know what they did?! They made my home into a casino!!!� Hades was now ranting with a flaming shock of red fire running over his shoulders. I flinched from the extreme heat emanating from his body. Suddenly he calmed down and said, �Okay, I�m cool, I�m cool.� He ran his hand through his hair again. �Besides, I want to see the little sunspot and see how he grew up. See ya!� With that, he vanished with a poof of black smoke. I coughed. �I really don�t like him,� I said, waving the smoke from the area. �Reminds me of Loki.� Thor nodded. �He seemed a bit high strung lately.� Shiva nodded. �From what Hercules told me once, he hit Hades into the River of Souls. He must have gotten out lately.� �Hades. What�s his profile anyways?� I asked. �Hades is a nasty God who wanted to take over Olympus when we still lived on earth. He enlisted several monsters and the Titans.� Ares answered bitterly. �The Titans?� I asked, �What are the Titans?� �A group of nasty monsters, about the size of the World Trade Center nowadays. There was a tornado monster, a Cyclops, a lava monster, a rock monster and a ice monster. On Hercules eighteenth year as a Demi-god on earth, he was stripped of his powers and Hades released the Titans from their undersea prison. With some time, Hercules regained his strength, though he never told me how that happened, and fought the Titans with Kami-sama who was then known as Zeus. Hera, his wife had retired and gave birth to you and your sisters several centuries later. Hercules is you big brother.� I gasped in shock. �We have a brother?� �By blood.� Ares affirmed, �he�s several centuries older than any of you and lives in the Grecian part of Olympus. You might want to look him up soon.� �Wow,� I said. �I gotta go, Bell and Skuld�ll be waiting for me.� With that, I dove into the TV screen above the bar. Ares snorted and returned to his drink. Once downing it, he stood and said, �I�m going to tell Zeus about his brother�s return. I�ll be back.� Ares then ran out and summoned his chariot and golden horses. He flew off into the sky, heading towards the high skyscraper in the distance. *** Kami-sama sat at his office, manipulating a store keeper into supplying the wedding arrangements when a urgent knock came at the door. He looked up and said, �Enter.� A tired Ares burst into the room. �Sir!� He said, �Hades has returned from the Underworld and is walking around Heaven!� Kami-sama immediately changed into his Zeus form. He was now very broad shouldered, wore a light purple toga, long white curls of hair running down his shoulders, a stately beard, sparkling blue eyes and a voice like Rip Thorn with a mike. His toga was held with a golden clasp and purple. The symbol was a golden cloud with a lightning bolt from it. Zeus stood up, and started to pace the floor. �Hmm... so my brother has returned from the Underworld. I was wondering when this would happen.� He turned to look at the red and orange God. �Watch him. I don�t want anything to happen. But when it does, I will put a emergency plan into motion.� �Yes Zeus.� Ares left and Zeus stared into the sky. Hera had died when Lucifer had betrayed him and killed her when she had tried to protect him from harm. Zeus was restricted from bringing her back since it was her time to go. He still remembered the hard golden shaft through her heart, and cradling her in his arms. She had given birth to Skuld only a few years ago. Zeus blinked back tears and recomposed himself. He strode over to a glass case in his office safe and opened it with a palm print. Inside was a large wrist bracelet. It was large, held a medallion of the Gods, gold with a clasp and covered at least four inches across the wrist. He knew it was time. With a cry, he hurled it into a portal. Down on earth, a sleeping Shaun lay in his bed, when the golden light attached itself to his wrist with a clank. The emblem flickered slightly and died out into a solid gold sheen. *** I walked Shaun to his classes in the Red Deer College. A wide grin was around his face as he walked along the road towards his school. The school was a nice place in a great location. I noticed a glint of gold on his wrist and said, �Hey, what�s on your wrist?� He looked at it and pulled back his sleeve. �It�s a bracelet. I found that it won�t come off. Its just appeared sometime last night.� I stared at it. �It�s pretty big. Are you sure you don�t know where it came from?� �Nope.� I shrugged and we resumed walking down to the school. �One thing puzzles me,� I said, �where did the bracelet come from?� He shrugged, �Dunno. Probably Peorth or Thor playing a joke on me.� I grinned inwardly, Just like Peorth to pull something. She probably sealed the bracelet on the wrist with her magic, on a time lock seal. �Just wait it out,� I chided, �the bracelet�ll probably come off sooner or later.� *** I watched from Shaun�s pocket when he entered the Bio room and sat down, a wide grin on his face. His classmate next to him noticed. �Hey, what�s with the grin?� Shaun grinned even wider. �I�m getting married.� Garrick, who decided to attend RD College, blinked. �Rrrriiiiiiiight.� �Seriously. I was told I had to marry my girlfriend at the end of the month. Her father is preparing everything. Wanna be the best man?� Garrick looked at him, a quirky look on his face. �You, aren�t joking, are you? You...are really getting married, aren�t you?� He nodded slowly. �Skuld�s father said that I had to marry her in two weeks.� He suddenly plunked his head on the table, knocking my diminutive body out of his front shirt pocket. �IT�S TOO FREAKING SOON!!!� he screamed out in frustration. I expanded to my full size and massaged his back in sympathy. Garrick stared at me in surprise since I just seemed to pop out of nowhere. �Hey, who�re you?� �I�m Urd, Skuld�s older sister.� I answered in English. �The kid here is just overwhelmed somewhat. Father is very excited about this.� �Does Shaun�s parents know about this?� I nodded. �He broke it to them a few days ago. They were surprised to say the least.� *** Hades sat in his dark room, pondering the methods of getting a good deal on the buffet line when the Demon Maller slinked into his room. �Hey there,� she said. �You bitter?� �Heck no,� Hades responded, �I�m fine, just peachy. I just get out of the river of souls to find out that the world has changed in a millennia. Whatever happened to the Grecian Empire Huh?!?!� By now, Hades was starting a full rant. �And another thing, there�s no FREEDOM in this world! If you try and take over Olympus, you get several hundred gods and goddesses countering it with ease, no thanks to that Blasted Super Computer running everything up there!!! And the ONE SHELEMIEL, WHO CAN STOP ME, CAN�T BE KILLED, AND NOW, HE�S GOTTEN MORE SUNSPOTS, TO HELP HIM RULE THE WHOLE WORLD!!!� Hades flung a blast of flame outwards from his body in a blind rage, incinerating the Gothic decor, and blackening a hapless demon room service waiter. Hades puffed angrily, putting a cigar in his mouth, and igniting his thumb, taking a few lighting puffs while holding the flame to the end. �All right, I�m cool, I�m cool, I�m fine.� He leaned back in his chair and shut his eyes tightly. Maller laughed, throatily as she came up behind his head and started to massage his temples. Hades sighed, unnoticing the minuscule flow of dark power through her fingers, developing a V above his eyes. Soon, Maller left his room and pulled out a cell phone. �Boss?� she said, �I was able to change Hades into a Demon. Now, he can be bent to our will.� //Good,// Came a deep voice from the other end, //make sure you manipulate him to kidnap the Goddess of the Future. Don�t make him interfere if he rebels.// �Understood.� *** I relaxed in the large plush chair in Shaun�s home, watching the TV. The show was pretty good, about a few angels going around doing good. Touched By An Angel I think its called. The Angel of Death is pretty cute. Pity that Death is a beautiful woman here. I haven�t been like that since...a long time. Yeah, I thought, going into a wistful reverie, Aphrodite was great for the Goddess front. So was that girl Michiru. All things aside, I sat in the chair, watching when the five stooges came into the room. Tenchi, Mamoru, Ranma, Keiichi and Shaun. Shaun seemed very nervous. If he never vowed to drink alcohol, I would have given him some Sake that I was drinking. I couldn�t blame him, since the wedding was two days away. He was babbling nervously, trying to relax. I walked into the kitchen and came out with a glass of Soda. He took it and drank it in a few gulps. He was nervous as heck. I slipped in beside Ranma and said, �You think he�s going to be all right?� Ranma shrugged. �Maybe. Its sudden for him. Two weeks ago he was a regular senior. Now, he�s going to be a married man.� �And you have a deep fear of rejection, don�t you?� I said with a throaty chuckle. Ranma blushed. I knew that he had a insecure sexuality. Notwithstanding since he had that Jusenkyo Curse. Which reminds me... I splashed Shaun with a glass of water. Somehow, he didn�t attract water like Ranma, so he changed a total of five times in a month, mostly on his own volition. Ranma and the guys blinked and I just remembered that they haven�t found out about Shaun�s curse. Ranma gaped. �You�re cursed?!� he exclaimed. Shaun nodded, a bit more controlled than she used to be. �Yeah, it was about a year ago. I think I still have some frozen Nanniichuan water somewhere.� �Honto?!� Ranma was ecstatic. �You really have some Jusenkyo water?!� �I think so. Somewhere around here,� she said dismissively. Tenchi walked up and poked her chest. He developed a small nosebleed. Shaun looked at him. �You know, I never understood why Anime men developed nosebleeds when seeing a naked girl.� I had to admit, I never thought about that question before either. But then she had a lot of time on his hands. �Okay, the shows over. Shaun, get some rest. The rest of you, get to bed. Move people!!� The others nodded and walked to the extra rooms where separate beds were put down. Their family would be transported tomorrow so they were sleeping in her house. I followed Shaun to his room and closed the door behind me. She whirled around in shock. �Urd,� she probed, �what�re you doing?� �Getting you to relax,� I answered. �You got a big two days next. Now get undressed, I�ll find something for you.� She nodded, embarrassed, and quickly shucked his clothing. I handed him a small nightgown that I gave to him for a Birthday joke. That was about a month ago. She looked at it and blushed. �This is pretty flimsy,� he commented. �Just wear it.� I snapped, �a girl has better nerve control than guys usually. And get some female underwear while you�re at it. Probably the ones I gave you.� �Urrrrrrrrrrrdddddd!� she whined, �those are thongs practically!� �Whatever. Now move and get some rest.� She sighed and pulled out the package of panties I gave her as a joke during Christmas last year and quickly donned the flimsy clothing. Soon, she slipped into the covers and stretched out. Damn she�s sexy, I thought. She�s got enough build to make a man stand up at attention by just stretching. I then smirked, It amazes me that she kept his secret more easily than Ranma ever did. I turned around and snapped off the light. �Night Shaun,� I said, a wistful smile on my face. �Night Urd,� she said in a soprano voice. *** Midnight. A shadow phased into Skuld�s room and engulfed her in a wave of mist. She disappeared and soon, the mists faded out, leaving a letter behind. *** Shaun came out into the living room where I was still reading and drinking a bit of Sake. I looked up, a frown upon my face. �I thought I told you to go to bed.� She shook her head, �I can�t sleep,� came the reply. I sighed. �Then I�ll have to do it the old fashioned way.� I grabbed her hand and pulled her into the bedroom, locking the door behind me. I slipped off my dress. Her eyes bugged out in shock. �Wha�re you doing?!� she said in a barely controlled voice. �I�m going to wear you out until you fall asleep from exhaustion.� I replied, planting a firm kiss on her lips. The girl sagged into my embrace and I grinned inwardly. Perhaps just this one time I could revert back. It�s for a good cause anyhow. I snapped off the lights and the rest, is all up to you. *** Ranma was flipping pancakes when I came out of the bedroom, a relaxed young girl in a very flimsy nightgown walking behind me. Ranma looked up from the kitchen stove and developed a gushing nosebleed. Tenchi came in the dining room and nearly fainted as with Keiichi. I sighed. Men and nosebleeds. It�s a wonder that they didn�t pass out from loss of blood. During breakfast, I noticed that only Mamoru was mature enough to control his hormones and keep from passing out. I kind of like that in a man. Tenchi spared a glance upward and noticed the young girls messed up hair. �Hey, Shaun, what�s with the hair?� �Urd made me relax last night,� she replied. �How?� Ranma asked. Shaun grinned ferally. �Guess.� The men facefaulted from the implied suggestion. Keiichi pulled his body up from the floor. �You didn�t,� he accused me. �I didn�t take hers,� I protested. �She passed out through number five.� Tenchi and Ranma developed nosebleeds. Mamoru just looked weak. Keiichi fainted. Again. For the umpteenth time. I stared at him, disgusted. �If you�re going to marry Belldandy, then how�re you gonna keep from fainting on your wedding night?� Keiichi had the effort to look sheepish as he sat up and returned to his breakfast. Shaun yawned and stretched. Ranma and Tenchi turned away for decency sake. �Hey Shaun,� Mamoru said, not looking from around his paper, �Whadda say you put some clothes on.� �Why?� she said, grinning catlike, �I kind of like these clothes.� She stood up and sashayed into the kitchen, drawing stares to her rear. Of course, the panties just happened to be riding up and the guys fainted. She giggled, �Okay, okay, I�ll put some clothing on.� With that, she retreated into the master bedroom. Soon, she came back, dressed in a white shirt with buttons down the front, jeans, and her now short hair swept back in a unisex style. She sat down and finished her drink. �I sorta like having long hair as a girl.� She said. �Then why did you cut it?� Ranma asked. She shrugged, �My male form doesn�t look good with long hair.� Mamoru nodded. �Since when did you get cursed?� �About a year ago. For some inexplicable reason, I don�t attract water like Ranma does.� I then grinned. �Tokyo must have a weird effect on everyone. I�ve been able to keep my curse secret for a long time. You guys are the first ones to find out.� �Some people have all the breaks,� Ranma muttered and returned to speedily eating his breakfast. *** �One day,� Shaun said. �One more day.� I nodded as we headed to the Church. Behind us strolled the guys who were trying not to be perverts. I couldn�t blame them since they had two very beautiful females walking in front of them. Soon, we reached the Church and Belldandy rushed out to meet us. She looked flustered. Very so. �Urd! Shaun! Skuld�s been kidnapped!!!� *** �Dear Shaun, you�re presence is requested on behalf of your fiancee. Come to Hades Underworld to meet me. Signed, Maller.� He angrily crumpled the black letter in his fist and trembled with rage. �Damnit,� he ground out, �she�s gone too far.� Mamoru nodded. �This Maller,� he said, �what is she?� �Maller�s a demon,� I answered. �About class 15.� �Um, no comprende. Speak in Yu Yu Hakusho power ratings please.� Shaun said absently. �Okay, um...high B class. Bordering on A class. Nasty woman. Harasses us almost monthly.� I answered. Bell nodded, a slight frown on her face. That scared me more than facing Thor�s old wife in Bull-in-china-shop mode. Ranma slapped his fist into his hand. �Then we�ll rescue her.� Tenchi and Mamoru nodded. �No.� Ranma, Mamoru and Keiichi looked up in surprise. Shaun stood there, still a girl. She had taken off her jacket and revealed that weird bracelet on her arm. To my surprise, it had thickened in width and became more a bracer than a bracelet. The golden symbol of a cloud and lightning bolt glowed with golden light. �I�m going in by myself.� �Are you suicidal?!� Tenchi shouted, �you�re not a fighter, you�ll be killed!!!� �I don�t care. If I can save her without endangering more people, then so be it.� �Then you�ll need this,� Belldandy said, holding a carved stick with a falcon engraved in its golden shaft. It was about a foot long with gold highlights and Scandinavian script on it. �This will help you.� She stared at it. �What the hell is this?� Bell frowned and I started to sweat nervously. Belldandy never berated anyone but a frown was Bell�s equivalent to a proverbial �Death from above� act. And that was REALLY bad. �That�s a weapon.� Shaun grunted. �Weapon? No offense but I�d rather use a Poke ball filled with a Rattata at level 2. Do you realize that I don�t have a freaking clue how to use this?!� Uh oh, she was starting to go into a Hades, Lord of the Dead rant mode. �I don�t see how a designer stick with the length of a forearm�ll help with this! If there was a blade or even had the chance to spring a trident from it, FINE! But nooooooooo! It has to be a stick that the stupid guy on that weird show with that spirit fighter or whatever has, and NOW, THE ONLY THING THAT STANDS BETWEEN ME AND OBLIVION IS A STUPID STICK!!!!� I could swear that if he was Hades, a corona of fire would blast out from his body, and incenerate the inside of the Church. Tenchi yawned. �You done yet?� Shaun suddenly stopped. �Yeah, I�m fine, I�m cool.� she calmly ran a hand through her purple hair. I slung a friendly arm around her slender shoulders. �Hey, we�ll get her back.� She let out a deep sigh. �I guess. But what kind of weapon is this anyways? A bloody Lightsaber?� Belldandy blinked. �To be honest, I don�t know exactly.� �Great. We�re gonna die.� suddenly she slipped into her Hades mode. �Nothing personal, just wanna get some work done, contract done, yadda yadda yadda, fine print, red tape, we dance we kiss we smooze, we carry on we go on home happy, whadda say? Hey, I don�t have time to bat this around, I like need an answer like, NOW.� Everyone, excluding me, stared at the babbling girl. �Welcome to her hyperactive stage,� I said dryly. �Riiiigggggghhhhhtttt,� Ranma dragged out. �Anyways, lets go to that Underworld.� Mamoru nodded grimly. �I�m coming too. Usagi�ll never forgive me if I don�t help you guys.� With a swirl of rose petals, he changed into his Tuxedo, top hat, mask and cape. In his hand was his cane. Tenchi slipped on a bracelet and pressed it. The golden disc of light flowed over his body, clothing him in a skintight bodysuit with two large rings on his shoulders. In his hand he held the Tenchi-ken. His face had two stripes on his cheeks. Ranma grinned. �Nice transformations.� �Thanks,� they both chorused. Shaun, on her hand, had loosened her dress shirt and tied it around her middle, rolling up her sleeves. The bracer on her left arm covered her forearm in a flexible metal, which was really strange since it was all gold. On the center of the bracer was the symbol and she had slipped on loose pants, loose enough that it wouldn�t restrict her movement when fighting. Actually, the pants were her jeans. She got really slim while a girl. I for one, didn�t know she came ready with fighting clothes. For that matter, she didn�t come prepared for fighting at all. Life�s little mysteries. Shaun swept the loose bangs away from her face and clipped the stick on her belt. �Lets go.� I nodded and drew a magic circle in the air. Soon, the air shimmered and a glowing purple vortex of power expanded from it. They filed in, Shaun pausing to say, �Keep a light on. We�ll be back.� The purple light winked out as she stepped inside. I looked on, worriedly. �Do you think they�ll be all right?� I asked. Belldandy nodded slightly. �I hope so.� Keiichi leaned back, a faint frown on his face. �I hope that stick�ll have something important to it.� *** �Geez. Welcome to Blade. Check the vampires at the door,� I dead-panned. �SHUT UP!� The others chorused. Tenchi heaved a exasperated sigh. �Come on, lets go.� We headed down the stone hallway. Soon, a greenish light appeared at the end of the room. Just then, the room opened up to reveal a long green river of things with a skeleton standing at the edge of the river, a long stick in his hands and a boat under his skeletal feet. I shuddered and opened my mouth to comment. Tuxedo Kamen�s warning glare shut me up. Tenchi jumped down to the boat and said slowly, �Is this the boat to the Underworld?� The skeleton looked at him and said in a death like voice, (which, by the way, Death is actually a very pretty woman) �It is if you wanna see Hades.� Tenchi nodded and yelled back, �this is our boat!� �Gee, ya thing so?� Ranma dead-panned. �Shut up and get on.� I leapt down on the lower stone protrusion and got on the boat. The others followed suit. Soon, the skeleton pushed away and we floated down the river of death, occasionally batting the souls of dead people away. (And I gotta tell ya, that soul of Adolf Hitler was no easy task in beating back). *** �They�re coming,� Maller said. //Good. Prepare for phase 2.// Maller slowly put down the phone but stopped. She raised it to her ear and said, �Um, don�t mean to be a bother but, what IS phase 2?� A deep groan came over the cellular. //Do I have to do everything myself? Phase 2 is the extraction of the bracer the girl is wearing.// �Oh yeah.� *** �Gee, what�s behind door number one?� Shaun whipped open the door and leapt back as a Doberman head lashed out. �SHIT!� She stumbled backwards. The other two doors burst open to reveal the other two heads. �Cerebrus,� She said, holding the stick in front of herself defensively. �The three headed dog which guards the Underworld.� Tenchi had ignited the blade of the Tenchi-ken. �So what do we do now?� �We fight, run or throw a dog bone the size of a pine tree.� Ranma grabbed a dead log that was sitting at the side of the room. �This good enough?� he asked, hefting it under his arm. �It�s better than nothing,� Tuxedo Kamen said, holding several roses between his fingers, ready to throw. Ranma hucked the huge log at Cerebrus. The middle dog grabbed it and started to chew. The other two heads joined it and continued chewing. Tenchi inched past the heads without interference. He waved to the others and they followed close behind. Shaun took the lead. As they walked down the hall, the room came into view. And three guesses who was standing at the entrance. �Welcome to the Underworld.� Hades greeted, a sinister smile on his face. �I�m so glad you came to join me.� He snapped his fingers and Skuld appeared. She was strung out on a cross, tied with those nasty chains of death he used on Megera. �Is it me or is it Neon Genesis Evangelion all over again?� Shaun muttered, holding the stick in front of herself. �Let her go Hades,� she called out, her eyes not leaving Skuld�s prone form. �Not yet,� Hades said, conjuring up a spiked throne. �I just got out of the River of Death and I want to see the world without interference. I have a bone to pick with Zeus. So, what better way to get back at him is through his kin.� �You�re sick,� Ranma growled, dropping into a stance. Tuxedo Kamen reached into his jacket and pulled out a garden worth of roses in his fist. Tenchi ignited the Tenchi-ken. �Perhaps. But I�ve always been evil. Now, after I destroy the future, I�m gonna take over Olympus again. Hey, second times the charm, huh?� Shaun gritted her teeth as her grip on the stick tightened. �How can you say that? She�s given a lot to be what she is today. Now, I can�t forgive you for what you�ve done.� �I think not.� Hades raised his hand and a burst of flame blazed into her chest, barely spraying off of a thin forcefield which surprisingly raised in front of her body. She flew back into the wall, screaming in pain. Ranma yelled and cupped his hands. �Mouko,� The blue ball of crackling chi grew into her hands. �TAKABISHA!!� Chi blast met fire. The two energies exploded, sending all combatants into the room. As if on a cue, Makai demons poured into the room, their eyes set on blood lust. Tuxedo Kamen sent several roses into the necks of the demons and knocked one away with his cane. Tenchi came in, and cut down several with a lightning fast pass, dismembering many from their souls. Ranma punched one, and kicked away another. He launched his Chestnut fist into several others to get to Hades. Hades was flung back into the wall. He got up almost immediately and dusted off his toga. �Nice punch,� he commented. He snapped his fingers and a legion of Makai demons flooded into the room. Soon, the others found themselves overwhelmed until Ranma cleared out the room with a well placed Hiryushotenha attack. Tenchi rushed over to the girl and shook her back to consciousness. �Shaun, wake up.� She mumbled as her eyes snapped open. �Huh? Are we still fighting?� �Well duh,� he whipped his sword hand back and decapitated another demon. �Can you fight?� She nodded and stood up shakily, her hand wound tightly around the carved falcon stick. �If only I knew how to use this thing, I could fight better.� Tenchi nodded and kicked backwards, kocking a demon off his feet. Shaun whipped around and whacked another across the face and jammed the end of the stick in its face. It reared back in pain and she swung her foot around in a kick. The demon, surprisingly, flew back about five feet and it crashed to a halt. Shaun went into a type of style that Ranma found curious. It seemed to be heavily based on basic Karate and a Asian weapon style. Later when he asked about it, the young half man/girl, said �It�s my variation on all the styles I learned in the past. Which is mostly freestyle.� With every passing moment, the girl became more tired. She slammed the butt of the stick into her opponents skull, feeling a bit weak from the purple, blue and green blood that spurted out from the dead demons. Her hands were coated in the slimy warm blood as she clenched them open and close. She stared into the stick, wishing it would do something to work. Suddenly, the others slammed into the wall behind her in succession. Shaun rushed towards Mamoru and shook him back into consciousness. �You okay?� �Ask me again when the room stops spinning,� he groaned. She woke the others and looked up behind herself. The other monsters were regrouping, forming a wall in front of Maller who had appeared during the fight. She grimaced as a sharp pain ran through her side. A claw had gashed her side pretty badly. �I wish this thing would tell me something useful,� she thought rufuly. With a bright glow, it answered her prayers. Maller gasped at the intense light coming from the stick. She shielded her eyes and gasped out, �what�s going on here?!� The golden bracer glowed with golden light as it coursed into the stick. A wave of energy solidified into a bright golden shine. The blade formed and hovered about a inch over the now proclaimed hilt. Tenchi stared at it. �Sheesh, it looks like the Tenchi-ken blade.� Shaun shot a look up into the sky, �you just HAD to wait, didn�t you father?� A acknowledging rumble echoed over the cavern. Shaun sighed and raised the blade, the golden sheen flickering its shadows over her face. �This thing is finally good for something. And now, lets see what it can do up close and personal.� She launched into the fray, quick swipes carving a road into the demons. When she reached Maller, the demon raised a dark shield. But she just leapt over it and slashed the chains of death. Skuld fell into her arms. Her eyes flickered open. She yawned. �What a sleep.� then she noticed their surroundings. �Oh, I�ll just take a leave now.� Shaun nodded and brandished the blade menacingly to ward off demon attacks. But she paused to slice a small smoke tendril coming from Maller�s hands. She shrieked as the energy was cut. Hades blank look disappeared with the markings on his face. �Whoa, whatta day. So, Maller, you wanna play with fire punk?� Maller could only �EEP� and she turned tail and ran. Hades looked at the heroes, a wry smile on his face. �I�ll bring you guys back up to earth. Consider me in your debt all of you.� With that, they all disappeared in a burst of smoke. *** I paced the room worriedly when they appeared in a burst of smoke. Skuld barreled into my chest, crying, happy to see both of us again. Belldandy soothed her as she whimpered. Just then, we heard a thump as a body hit the floor. I turned around to find Shaun, laying there, exhausted and unconscious. Peeling Skuld off of my body, I pulled the girl up over my shoulder, careful not to let the mixed demon blood from dripping on my clothes from her stained hands. �We gotta get her to a doctor,� I said, looking around for a TV. �We�ll go to Dr. Tofu�s,� Ranma said, �Someone is always watching TV at the Tendos.� I nodded and pulled out a small flatscreen TV from my pocket. With that, I stepped inside, not before watching Hades shooting a apologetic look my way. I narrowed my eyebrows, silently saying, �well discuss this later. Follow us.� Bell activated her mirror transport and the boys walked in, Mamoru supporting a emotionally tired Skuld on his arm. *** Akane sat in front of the TV, worried. Ranma hadn�t come back from wherever he was for days now. Everyone was handling his disappearance with their own way. Kuno was saying that he �ran from his noble blade�, Kodachi, well, lets not get into that, Ukyou, she was cooking non stop every time she opened her shop and Shampoo was nearly tearing open the district looking for Ranma. Akane found herself watching TV nonstop. Ryoga, on the other hand, was still searching for Ranma in order to beat the tar out of him when he found the wayward martial artist. She sighed and laid back when suddenly, the TV flared and a pair of bronze legs stepped out. Akane rubbed her eyes to see if she was dreaming. Soon, hips, torso, and a platinum blonde head appeared from out of the screen. Over her shoulder was a young girl, wearing jeans, a ripped dress shirt, a golden bracer on her left arm and a engraved stick clutched in her hands. Her hands dripped some odd colored liquid with a pungent scent to it. Akane found her voice. �Who...who are you?� �No time to explain. Is Dr. Tofu�s office around here?� Akane nodded slowly. �Is there a problem?� Urd nodded. �She�s fainted from stress or something.� Just then, the mirror gleamed and Belldandy stepped out, Ranma, Tenchi, still in battle gear, and Tuxedo Kamen holding her hand. Akane spun around, a mixture of shock, anger and delight etched on her face. �RANMA!� The martial artist grinned wearily. �Hey Akane, what�s up?� Akane�s smile turned to a scowl as she punched him in the side. Ranma buckled under the punishment. �Where have you been BAKA!!!� She raised her trusty wooden mallet but Belldandy�s soft voice stopped her. �Please don�t, he has just fought against the forces of darkness.� Akane looked at the sandy haired goddess. �Kasumi?� �No, Belldandy. These men need treatment. Is the clinic around here?� Akane nodded and led the way, the others following behind her. *** Ryoga Hibiki. What can be said about him? He�s extremely innocent, naive, and thick as a rock. I, for one, don�t like his attitude. He comes out of nowhere, screaming, �RANMA PREPARE TO DIE!!!� I frown and blast him into next week with a full force wind spell. Akane looks at me and asks, �chi attack?� �Something like that,� I responded irritably. Soon we reached this small clinic and found a irritated Panda sweeping the front. It looked up and raised a wooden sign. �So my worthless son has come back?� I scowled at him. �Don�t push it Saotome or else you�ll find yourself a full time Panda.� The Panda would have gone pale under its fur. I hefted the girl over my shoulder and walked into the clinic. A twentyish old man looked up. �So what�s the problem?� �Dr. Tofu I presume? I�m Urd Megami. Shaun and the other men behind me needs medical attention. They�ve been in quite a battle.� He nodded as he adjusted his glasses. �All right, lay the young girl on the bed.� I complied and laid her small form on the bed. He ran his fingers over her pressure points and asked, �Philipino?� I nodded. �How is she?� �Well, her ribs are bruised, she has a cut on her side, much like a claw swipe. And she�s emotionally and physically drained. What was she fighting against?� I thought about it. No harm telling the truth. �Demons. Nasty gruesome creatures of darkness. You don�t wanna see them up close and personal.� He nodded sagely as his fingers sought out the proper pressure points and pressed them. �That should help the healing process.� he got up and worked on Ranma, Tenchi and Tuxedo Kamen in succession. Soon, the girl stirred and asked, �Didja get the license plate number of that Mack truck? I think it was carrying some anvils with it.� Skuld grasped her slim hand. �Shhh, it�ll be all right. How�s your injuries?� �Not bad, considering I got slashed by a demon�s claw.� She then smiled. I noted, catlike. �Then there�s no fun for a week until you heal.� she kissed her gently as the girl slipped back into a blissful slumber. *** Tofu lowered his mug. �So Shaun has a Jusenkyo curse, same as Ranma?� Skuld nodded. �And now, she�s targeted by the demons of hell?� �Until we get them off our backs then there is nothing I can do...� Belldandy trailed off as she looked at the moping Skuld. �But I don�t think that getting injured on the eve of their wedding will help much.� Akane nodded sympathetically. �I guess they get along well, don�t they?� �Very.� Belldandy raised her mug of Darjliing tea to her lips and drank. �You must now keep a secret that all of us have kept together.� Tofu and Akane looked at each other and nodded. Bell continued. �Shaun is a mortal from Canada who has a lot of knowledge of our lives. From where he is, we are all Anime characters. The men in the room are Mamoru Chiba, and Tenchi Masaki. Myself, Urd and Skuld are goddesses.� Akane gasped. �But...I know about that because of the Anime!� I sighed. �That�s why you must keep us a secret along with the others. You and one other can come to the wedding, but it must be kept secret from all the rest of your family.� �Why?� Akane asked. �Because all the heavenly hosts will be attending. God himself will be there to attend the wedding. Only three from each of Shaun�s trusted friends will be there.� I grinned. �Perhaps you might want to speak with Aphrodite about your relationship with Ranma.� Akane blushed. *** Two days later... Ranma tinkled the silver bell to gain the rest of the peoples attention. �Ladies and gentlemen, a toast to the new couple!� A roar from the heavenly crowd swelled over the rented banquet hall in the CUC Cafe. A yell from a totally drunk Thor and Hades, who by now had become good friends, was, �GIVE HER EVERYTHING TONIGHT!� I grinned as the new couple blushed. To the right sat Usagi, Mamoru and Rei in one group. To the left sat Tenchi, Ayeka and Ryoko. Near the front sat Ranma, Akane and Ukyou and next to them sat Garrick, Tara and Jordi. They all roared their approval as the couple thanked the crowd. I could swear that Father who was sitting next to the new couple was grinning like a madman one second and the next, not. Everyone was pretty rowdy, even father himself who was ready to party. I noted that the mortal friends that were sitting below the newlyweds were nervous at having the most divine being sitting right behind them. That was until, Father stood up and whispered something into Garrick�s ear. He lost all tension in a second. I looked at Mr. and Mrs. Shaun Garin. �So, what�s the verdict? He strong enough to get through the night?� Skuld blushed deeply. Shaun had the same shade. �Well, he�s still injured so we�ll wait a couple of days.� She grinned. �Then the fun will begin.� End Chapter 6 I love self-inserts, don�t you? I went over this chapter sporadically, checking it with spell check. You would NOT believe how many times it wanted to change my errors. Until Next time. Next Episode : Magic Knights and Cluelessness